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I love listening to Krista St. Germain's Widowed Mom Podcast. She has talked about doing a "Brain Dump" where you just write our your thoughts on paper. Just get it all out. Yesterday I did my first "Brain Dump" after a hard day at work. It is funny that the days at work without students are so much harder than the days with students. The students are why I teach.
We had two optional teacher development days to get ready for distance learning. It was a lot of great information but a hard day. So much unknown, so much minute by minute change, so much is different. I am a widow who is one year out, in a new grade level this year, I have two boys leaving for college, our (I still like saying "our" to include my husband) daughter is starting her senior year virtually, and I am working on learning new programs for distance learning. (Not sure if it's weird that I like to say "our" but I'm going to keep doing it.)
On my way home from work yesterday, I really missed the routine I had of calling my husband on my way home. I didn't do it every day but I knew I could always get his support and love. Boy, I miss that.
The load is heavy. I love having our three kids home right now. Being a mom is my favorite. We have spent these five months playing ping pong, watching Netflix, working in the yard, and going to the beach. The number of people living at home is shrinking fast and I literally feel tightness. It literally hurts. I am so happy for the boys to head off, truly happy for them while at the same time hating that they are growing up.
This last year has had layers of challenges. It isn't one challenge at a time, it is like three or four really big ones all at once. I feel stronger but I also feel ovewhelmed. I still have a lot of work to do on me.
So last night, after feeling stuck in being overwhelmed, I went to my room and did a brain dump. I got it all out. I think I'm supposed to choose thoughts that are helpful and leave the others. I just left them all on the paper for now.
I want to work on leaving work at work. I love working on fun plans for the students at home but I want to leave the work stress at work. Any ideas on how not to bring the hard stuff home? Boy, am I looking forward to when the kids can come back to class. The students are the fun part of teaching.